Who told you you had to hate Valentine's Day? Kick 'em for me, will ya?

"I heard on the radio this morning some woman say she thought Valentine's Day was the most romantic day of the year".

I totally disagree with this statement for so many reasons. Well, actually on second thought, I agree with it. I don't doubt she totally heard that on the radio, and trying to refute it would not only be hard but a little ridiculous. But I digress.

Anyways, Valentine's Day isn't necessarily the most romantic day, unless of course that's just the way things have played out, and if that's the case, I feel bad for your relationship.

First off, this sense of "romanticism" that people associate with Valentines tends to carry a laundry list of "appropriate" or "expected" actions like chocolate, flowers, teddy bears, a good bottle of wine, and candlelight. And heaven forbid if anything on the list isn't met. Like, where the hell was my teddy bear, you rat bastard?!

First off, it's far too scripted and typical. There's no creative aspect, no sense of adventure or spontaneity, and in my mind, that's what real romance is about. People try to hard to be Casanova and stop being themselves. Chocolate and flowers is no way to woo me; that type of romance of pink and red make me wanna throw up a little. Anyways, it seems forced, and there always is some sense of entitlement associated with it. Like you deserve all of those things and if you don't get them, then the other party must not like you anymore. It's far too much drama to go into one day and usually ends in some sort of whining instead of wining (oh MAN, what a great pun).

So there's that side of Valentine's Day that just really irritates me. And there's another side too, but I'll get to that in a minute.

What really irritates me about the day is that it creates an internal conflict that really just isn't necessary. I have enough of them during the day for silly things like, what should I eat? or do I watch LOST or the Carolina game tonight? We're talking serious internal debates and stress here people. I really have little energy left to waste on a day about whether or not I like it, especially when it'll all be over soon enough. But then there's everyone you meet during the day, ready to throw in their two cents. And then you start ascribing points of views and feelings to people based on simple greetings, which gets frustrating in and of itself (and let's face it, it's only being frustrated with yourself).

For example, you walk into work and someone greets you with "Happy Valentine's Day!" and you automatically think, "what the hell is she/he so happy about? She must be one of those people that think you're required to enjoy the day and probably has a six o' clock dinner scheduled with mr./ms. significant other. Why can't they just keep their jubilee to them self?". Or you run across that person who looks like they could choke a guy with their stare alone. And maybe you even say something innocuous like "good morning" and they're already down your throat with "I hate this day." And you're left to think "lonely bastard. Poor guy/gal. Why can't they just let it be and enjoy the day for the day?"

When it comes down to it, I actually do enjoy Valentine's Day just as much as some other holidays. I very much see it's importance and the value of the day. I think it's a day where you can be reminded to be intentional about telling people you care about them, that they're important to you, and even if you don't say it everyday, you do think about them. It's why I've already made a list of people I need to talk to today to tell them I love them. And I get that I should be doing that everyday. Why make one day hold all that importance to itself, or why do you need a day to remind you? But the same thing happens with every other holiday. You are reminded to be intentional about making sacrifices during Lent, you are supposed to let your friend know how great they are on their birthday, remember family and what you're thankful for at Thanksgiving...remember that Irish people are awesome, beer is delicious, and almost everyone looks good in green on St. Patrick's Day (which let's face it is my real favorite holiday).

I did talk with my friend Stephen about it a lot this morning (after of course making my obligatory comment of Happy Valentine's Day, so he knows I care). We agreed that the day is far too commercialized. We ALSO agree it would be a lot more exciting if there were those cardboard Valentine's from the days of yore. Now let's not kid ourselves that those were awesome (like the Scooby Doo ones that said "I ruv roo" or "It's no mystery, you're my Valentine"). And I guess most people can't complain about the abundance of chocolate that people are willing to give out. I mean, I'm not too excited about it as I don't really like chocolate (stop the staring, you'll burn a hole in your monitor), but I can celebrate with everyone at least.

So there are problems with the day. I do dislike all of the people running around, rubbing it in your face. And I lament those couples that feel it necessary to celebrate. The ones who are probably headed on their way out if someone doesn't make the day just perfect. I promise they still care even if they don't want to get into "the spirit" of the day, just the same as your family loving you, even if they are scrooges on Christmas.

But then they'll do something I hate most of all...

Ok, wrong hoilday.

But what irritates me the most are people who lament the day; the ones who act like the whole world's against them on Valentine's Day. Like grouch number two from the earlier scenario. I say live and let live (or Live and Let Die, wasn't my favorite Bond movie, but it'll do). The point is everyone's entitled to their day if they want it. And people are gonna go around being disgustingly lovey on other days too, not just February 14th. I think what irritates me the most is that typically the people who are so hateful of the day are generally single by choice, or they have the possibility of being with someone if they wanted to, they just aren't for whatever reason, but it's still their own choice. I mean, there are benefits to being single. And being single doesn't mean being excluded from the day. You don't have to present a dating card at the door. I can understand those being regretful of the day who potentially have just been dumped or have ended a relationship or something to that extent, but those people who just happen to be single...You'll be single tomorrow too, that doesn't mean February 15th is a day to regret or dread or despise. And simply being mad at people who are happy, well that doesn't make much sense either.

Besides, think of all the money you're saving. And there's that laundry list you don't have to worry about.

I get it though, I do. It's everyone shoving it in YOUR face. Just try a little to be happy for them, it might be you one day.

So I enjoy the day as a day to say "I love you" to everyone I feel the need to say it to. Just don't be offended if I ignore the haters or the lovers today. That just aint how I roll, G.

Come on, there's someone you could be telling you love them. Go find them.